Happy Birthday Beautiful!!

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY La!!

My day started off as usual by getting up before the sun had risen, jumpin in the shower and getting ready for work. As I drove to work I had a worship cd in my car playing and as the songs played I had a bunch of mini-flashbacks. One of the last being of the wake. As I got off at my exit my eyes started to fill up with tears. THIS SUCKS! I came to a stoplight that normally I don't have to stop for. As I sat there listening to music and thinking of you, a butterfly started flying around my car and next to me. Of course this lead me to completely lose it. I got to my parking lot and just sat and listened to the words of the song. I walked to work and couldn't stop thinkin bout you. I was kind of dreading today for a multitude of reasons. One of them being that I had to learn some new machines and the person who was training me isn't real well liked in the lab. But as the day progressed, my co-worker told me stories about her life and gave me some really good advice that I needed to hear. And I, I just listened. Maybe that's all she needed. Was someone to just listen to her.

At the end of my shift I got my things together and walked back to my car. All the while contemplating if I could stop by the lake and be able to get back home in time to play softball at 7:30...I decided to wing it and go to the Planetarium. I found a close parking spot and learned that I stink at parallel parking. I grabbed my jacket, keys, water bottle, and my last 2 remaining cigarettes and walked to the place where you spent your last hours. I sat about a foot away from the edge because it was a little wet. At first I just cried. I'm just missin you girl! Then I began to smoke and cried some more. Just a few minutes later a huge wave came over the barrier and water was suddenly everywhere. I just had to laugh cause I know that you had a hand in gettin me soaked! I sat there for a while more with wet pants and just gazed out into the lake. As I went for my last smoke I realized that it too had gotten wet. I took that as a sign that I shouldn't be smokin anymore. Thanks. I left the lake and was at peace.

I got to softball (I was subbing for a friend) and told Jamie that we would win tonight. "For Laurie...in honor of her birthday!! We have to win!!" Guess what my dear?? We won!! 12-11 close game I know. But we won!! I played in honor of you. In honor of the wonderful friendship we had for 20 years. In honor of being sisters in Christ. In honor of being blessed with having you in my life!

I'm sad that you're not here. That I never got to buy you a legal drink. That I never got to go to a bar with you. But I know that you are rockin in Heaven. Life isn't the same without you in it. I miss you so much but I know that I will see you again. I love you dearly and will see you someday!