Growing Up

For those of you who know me....you know I will never fully grow up. I will always be a kid at heart and I don't see anything wrong with it!! Lately (maybe within the last year or more), I have been feeling that I'm letting life pass me by. I mean shoot I just graduated in May which now seems like a distant memory...That sucks! I'm already on job number 2 and I just started my career life....Weird....Anyways getting back to my whole reason for writing...I've been doing some thinking and reading and I've realized that I feel old. I feel like I grew up too fast and that I didn't have time to be that rebellious, reckless, stupid teenager. But then again, would that have changed me or the person I am today? Probably not. I had my chances to be stupid and reckless and I took some of those times and ran with them. I guess I'm just past that phase. I guess I just miss that. Now, I have some responsibilities that keep me from staying out all night like work the next afternoon. But when I was at school if I didn't feel like going to work, I would just have to call in and make an excuse. I can't really do that now.

One thing I have been talking about with people is my timeline. I had my life pretty well planned out in the love department. Funny how that always falls through. I look back to 6 years ago when I met my first love. And I look at my life now and think...we would have been married and divorced by now. He wasn't the right fit for me. He wasn't able to love me the way I needed to be. And that's ok. In reading this one book I realized that there is someone that God has planned for me and made specifically tailored, just for me. How cool is that? And I have been created for that one man. I just haven't found him yet. I read today in Song of Songs this "Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires". That verse is repeated a few times throughout that book. It really just kicked me in the head. I just need to be patient and wait until God has prepared us both for each other. I know there's a lot I need to work on and change in my life...so until then I will be content in the wonderful single life I'm leading and enjoy the time that I have to spend with my friends and family.

Have a wonderful sun shiny day!!!